Well bub woke up again around 1 screaming bloody murder…not sure why-maybe a bad dream. Do they have bad dreams this young? Ev tried rocking him back to sleep but the moment he put him down he was up screaming again. So we brought him to bed with us in hopes of maybe a bit more sleep. At first it seemed likely then slowly he woke wide up and here we are 2:51 in the am watching a vh1 special on Dave Mathews band-no cartoons on this early. I’m actually pretty awake, I’m sure mostly because of how uncomfortable I am-I’ll be hating life in a few hours. What is Bub doing -you wonder -while I’m writing this…ahhh well he’s running around slap happy chasing the dogs (who haha got up with us and now want to go back to sleep) I haven’t even turned any lights on…just the TV and this seems to be even more fun. Today is going to be a long one. Ok so cartoons start at 3 am…just in case anyone needed to know. So I’m thinking (ok hoping) that Aidan is going to come on May 23rd…why do I think this?….well it’s a full moon and I’m really ready to be done. So cross your fingers for me. Well I’ve had my tea and now feel sleepy so I’m going to lay down and hope Bub joins me…
Category: pregnant
Had another doctor apt yesterday, got to listen to the heart beat 🙂 No group b strep for me, so that’s good! I have the nicest doctor, he has a wonderful bedside manner. He seems to really love what he does and the miracle of child birth hasn’t lost any of it’s wonder. We talked about how amazing it is to feel the baby move, and spending time watching and enjoying it. So many people get caught up in the inconveniences and uncomfortable aspects of pregnancy they forget about the amazing thing happening inside them. I spend a lot of time in awe of my belly, always making Ev stop what he’s doing to feel Aidan move or touch what ever body part is poking out at that moment. It’s just amazing to me that there is a little person growing in my belly. I feel very lucky that my body can have babies…not only have babies but have them relatively easily -compared to many woman who have a hard time getting pregnant and very difficult pregnancies. I just feel very blessed.
I hope everyone had a great weekend and mother’s day! I had a great weekend. We did a bunch of window shopping and only ended up with a few odds and ends for the house…very good for us-we like to shop! Finally put up draps in Bub’s room, day light savings time was killing us. Mother’s day Bub (and Ev) made me cheerios with fresh fruit, it was the best bowl of cereal I’ve ever had!!! Then we had lunch at this diner called Taxi’s, that was also excellent. It was a wonderful weekend, I got lots of family time…couldn’t have ask for anything better for mother’s day 🙂
My monitor died on friday, so I won’t be updating quite as often till we get a new one. I like doing my writing at night after Bub’s in bed, but with one monitor and a computer guy for a husband time is tight.
Bub started humming and singing! We stood just outside the bathroom door listening to him tonight while he took a bath. It’s so cute…I think he got the humming from Ev-who always hums while rocking Bub to sleep. It’s just amazing how fast they grow and change. It’s hard to keep up. I wonder how he will be with Aidan…I got the baby swing out of the garage, cleaned it and set it up in the living room. Now when Bub could fit in it he would have rather died then been put in it…but now it’s like the best new toy in the world. He loves to sit in it-barely fitting. And now he likes to tip it over and drag it around the room, he-man! Hopefully he won’t mind Aidan using it. Bub’s great grandma is giving him a big boy bed, so he’s going to have to let go of his crib too! Maybe not right away, I think we’ll wait till he’s used to Aidan being here before making that change.
I go to the doctor again tomorrow…37 weeks! This every week stuff will sure make the weeks fly by. We are very ready! I’m tired of being uncomfortable. Everything hurts and no position is good, I wake up feeling run over. No fun!!! I’m ready for the chaos to begin, atleast I’ll be able to chase Bub around, wrestle and play with him. Those things are really hard now, getting up and getting down. I’m so curious how it will go this time…will it be around my due date? Will I be late again (please no)? Will I go by myself? I walk every day in hopes that it will get things moving,fantasizing that while I’m out on these walks my water will break and we’ll be off to the hospital for a quick no drugs needed delivery-I did say fantasize right?!
Yesterday was a really nice day! I had another doc apt…we listened to the heart beat and I got measured, tested for group b strep-you know all the exciting stuff. Aidan is doing great and the doc gave us the go ahead if I was to go into labor now they wouldn’t stop it-so that’s good! Ev came with us, it’s much easier when he’s there. We then got to spend the rest of the afternoon and evening together! It’s was so nice, we went out to dinner then came home and watched national treasure. It’s so rare these days that Ev has time to just hang out with us. He works very hard and we appreciate it, but we do miss him. Back to the doc apt…I was actually hoping for a pelvic exam this time-just to see if there is anything going on down there-but no internal exams until 38 weeks unless something crazy happens before then. I know it sounds crazy to want to be poked and prodded…but I’m just ready for this to be done and would like to know if any progress has been made. Oh well. I just keep reminding myself that no news is good news and better to only be poked at for 2 weeks then 4!
I’m so tired…being pregnant is finally catching up with me. I feel huge and clumsy and the peeing every 3 secs is getting old-literally every 3 secs! I’m hoping that it means Aidan has dropped- that sure would be nice. Not that it really means anything…but atleast things have started. I have a doctor’s apt tomorrow, maybe it will be an exciting visit. Bub and I went and walked around TJ-Max today (I was bored and felt like wondering) I found some pj pants for the hospital. The ones I had from Bub are too big-not that I’m complaining-better too big then too small! TJ-Max has the best suff…I love just walking around and looking at everything. They have cool shoes and bags, house stuff. A little bit of everything in one place. This is possibly the biggest one I’ve ever been too, which made it even more fun to walk around in. Nothing too exciting to talk about today…and haven’t had anything pressing on my mind so I guess I’ll leave you with a passage from “Meditations for Women Who Do Too Much“(Jennifer sent it, wonder if she’s trying to tell me something)…
Courage
Remember, Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did, but she did it backwards and in high heels.
-Faith Whittlesey
That’s right! Ginger Rogers was amazingly good at what she did, and so are we. It takes courage for women to acknowledge how good we are at what we do. We are caught up in a strange cultural expectation of having to be simultaneously competent and passive. This often results in a kind of humanity that really is a denial of our expertise.
Also, women who do too much seem to vacillate between exaggerating our compentence and feeling that we are worthless and totally incompetent. This vacillation between extremes is part of the addictive disease.
The real test of courage is being realistic and letting ourselves know that we really are competent at many things.
BEING GOOD at what we do isn’t a curse. It’s a gift that comes from ourselves and from a power greater then ourselves.