Man did I wake up hungry this morning…..strong intense overwhelmingly hungry…if I don’t eat I’m going implode hungry. So while making Lennox some cereal I also make myself a bowl. It was the best cereal I have ever had…just a little sweet and soft in the gloriously cold milk. I’m surprised I was able to taste it at all–I pretty much just tipped the bowl up and slurped it down. It was so good…I considered using one hand to pour the cereal in my mouth and the other to pour in the milk. I feel like a bottom less pit that aches to be filled. The joys of pregnancy! I’m sitting here now thinking I am hungry again and it’s been about 10 minutes since I put down the cereal and milk. Aidan must be growing. He’s definitely a busy little monkey. You can already see my stomach moving from all his gymnastics. I love feeling him move it’s like constant reassurance that he’s ok in my tummy. It would be hard if I couldn’t feel him beacause what you get at the doctors visits are a quick listen to the heart beat and that’s that. I feel like he’s a summer camp and I only get a quick phone call to let me know he’s ok. I wish we could do an ultra sound every time. That way in addition to hearing his heart I could see it moving. Speaking of ultra sounds I have a question for the world…when we found out his sex the ultra sound was done in the radiology dept instead of my docs office (a new one for me) apparently they can take pictures of all the organs and the doctor can see if everything is developing correctly. The pictures are so detailed that he can even see all the chambers in Aidan’s heart. Crazy huh?!? Lennox was born not even 2 years ago and they weren’t doing this then…is this something new or was it just because I was in Virginia and they are a little behind the times? Oh but back to my real question…we were given x-rays (real honest to god x-rays) as our take home pictures honoring his manhood…does anyone have any idea how to scan these in? We have tried a number of different things and nothing seems to work. So if you have any suggestions please send them my way. Then I’ll post his picture here too!
It’s raining again today – Yuck! Atleast yesterday it was clear long enough to go to the park but it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen today. So mall is on our to do list today. I’m having the worst time with Turkey. I want to open the front door and set him free. He annoys the crap out of me….it’s like he was born to make me miserable. I try to remind myself that he is still techincally a puppy…but gesh. Every morning he decides when everyone should get up. And it’s not because he wants to go pee – No he just wants to drive me insane. So if I don’t get up he will go and let himself into Lennox’s room and wake him up…knowing then I have to get up. You son of a bitch. So I remind myself again he’s just a puppy and couldn’t possible be doing these things on purpose…it’s all just a coincidence that he does this almost everyday. Ya know when pregnant there is always that one person who drives you insane…you can’t stand them and even the fact that they are alive bothers you…well this time mine is not a person…it’s a DOG. He is lucky that Evan is here because in my pregnant logic I would have dropped him off at the pound a long time ago. He’s just so different from Pepper…yeah she might have social issues and acts like she’s going to eat everyone she meets but once she’s gets to know you she is the sweetest dog you’ll meet. She likes to sleep in and holds it as long as she can on rainy days to avoid going outside. She mostly just hangs out and bugs you only when she wants out….although when we she was puppy…holy moly did she do some damage. Our first place was a little apartment in Oceanside and it was on the very back of the complex , you had to walk around the building from the parking lot to get to our front door while also passing the patio with a slidding glass door. On this day I must have forgotten to close the blinds…we came home from work and stopped infront of the patio because through the glass doors you could see Pepper laying on her back feet in the air asleep on the couch (well what was left of it) On the floor were the remains of an ottman, guinea pig hay, numerous dvds, a game boy-that didn’t belong to us, all the remote controls, and newspaper. This is what we could see from outside so inside left us both in awe. Anything she could have eaten she did…even things we didn’t think possible like the walls. This was the worst but she continued on her destroying binge for the first 2 years of her life….even eating an entire chocolate cake and a can of cleanser in one sitting (she was fine by the way vet said she has a stomach of steal) We still don’t trust her with the run of the house alone. Remembering these things makes me hate Turkey less…there is a chance that light may be at the end of this tunnel. He may turn out to be a wonderful dog and he makes Pepper happy and plays well with Lennox. That is why we got him anyway – to be Pepper’s friend.
Lennox lovin on Turkey
Pepper trying to sleep in
Rain rain go away DON’T COME BACK EVER!!! I think Valentine’s day is a little over rated. Evan and I do nice things for eachother every day. And we definitly don’t need a holiday to show how we feel for eachother. It’s funny though how it makes you feel obligated. Like if we don’t do something special we don’t really love eachother. Or even though Evan married me and takes care of my every need, rubs my back every night (that’s right every night ) because he didn’t get me flowers and or chocolates for Valentine’s day he no longer loves me. Dumb! In our house everyday is Valentine’s Day. Lennox and I had a really good time today. We went the park like we always do except this time I did my first of what I’m sure will be many boy things. We played in the dirt…dug holes and made dirt piles. It was so much fun and we got really dirty. He’s growing so fast. We weren’t playing next to eachother we were playing together…interacting. He’s past the only entertain me stage. Now he wants to and does entertain me. It so exciting and sad all at once. My baby is becoming a boy. We also sat down and made valentines for Evan. I sat him in his high chair at the kitchen table and cut out a heart from printer paper and handed him a couple crayons and he colored! So smart coloring at 17 months. It’s no surprise there is a lot of artist ability running threw his veins. Evan and I both went to art school. Man oh man is he attached to Evan these days…his daddy. He cries when he leaves for work and doesn’t leave his side when he comes home. Tonight he didn’t even want to go to bed – well unless Evan was going with him. He’s always been a character but it becomes more pronounced every day. I am lucky to be his mom.
He’s just so damn cute!
Well it’s raining again….ish. Looks like we’re going to walk around the mall. Lennox loves it he gets to ride in those car shaped strollers with a ballon. There is even a playground in our mall. Granted it’s packed when it rains…but he’s a tough kid and can stand a little knocking around! In honor of Valentine’s day I’m making a romantic dinner for Evan after Lennox goes to bed. The romantic part will be that Lennox will be in bed. We so rarely get to eat together-ALONE. This is our 4th Valentine’s day together….we had our first real date on Valentine’s day. We made dinner at his house – always a crazy place to be with 4-5 people living in a 2 bedroom place – we ended up drinking champagne and eating strawberries with all his roommates and their girlfriends. It was a great night. It’s crazy to think about all the Valentine’s days we have ahead of us. I am very lucky to have found Evan. He is an amazing man and I don’t think I could love anyone more then I love him. Everyone thought it wouldn’t last, that we rushed into getting married. I know almost 4 years doesn’t mean that we have lasted…but I have never been happier in my life and don’t see that changing any time soon. Marrying so quickly after meeting didn’t feel rushed, it felt right. I remember the moment I realized he was the one… He was giving me a ride to work and we stoped at starbucks (he was so addicted then) Evan decided he was going to run in I was going to stay with the car(I think we were double parked). He asked what I wanted and I said oh nothin, really wanting a chai latte but I didn’t have any money and felt weird about him paying for to much but didn’t tell him that… so in he went and out he came with his mocha and another cup which he handed me….it was a chai latte. So not only could this guy read me like a book but he knew what I always got from starbucks. I think we are just lucky…we are always on the same page. We know how to talk to eachother. We balance eachother out and calm eachother down. I miss him when he’s at work and look forward to him coming home every night. I am blessed with a perfect husband who has given me a great life with a beautiful son and another on the way.
I love both of you very much!!
I’m watching/listening to an old performance on a public access channel. It brings me back to the first time I heard her. A friend had Little Earth Quakes on tape and she played Crucify for me…I was 14. Maybe it was her voice or what she sang about but I was hooked, not even fully understanding all the lyrics. I loved singing along and imagining my future as a singer. All that time spent in my basement bedroom belting out “So you can make me come that doesn’t make you Jesus” good acoustics down there. I love how music can take you so vividly back. The memories run like a movie as the music plays. Winter played in Wendy’s car as we drove to the first day of my junior year at a new school in a new town in a new state. Thinking I was alone in my new apartment in San Francisco I sang along with Black Dove(loudly) as I unpacked…feeling free and excited by my new life. One of my roomates was home after all came to my room to see if it was me singing. I was really embarrassed…but he assured me I had nothing to be embarrassed about. Then after rebuying Under the Pink from Ameoba music on haight street…Past the Mission played in the background as my soon to be husband and I listen for Trent Reznor. It was a beautiful day and every time I hear that song I remember that excited new love feeling. When Lennox was a baby I would dance in the dark singing Sorta Fairytale softly until he feel asleep. So many memories…