Bub courtney General mom mother pregnant the kiddos


Well I had this whole rant on being a singer built up in my head…but the moment’s gone, so maybe I’ll feel the urge again soon. It’s been a slow Saturday, raining again. We were planning on going to the chinese new year celebration but nooooo it had to rain. So we went to the DMV instead and woowee was that fun. It’s weird going to the DMV – reminds me of being in customs – even though I’ve never been through customs. I figured if I did it would look like the DMV. Since then we’ve just been home watching TV, the joys of rainy days. I did get to talk to an old friend who is getting married and having a baby. I’m very happy for her…she acts like herself around this guy and I’ve never seen her do that with boys in the past. So that leaves one of my highschool circle who isn’t engaged, married or with child. But she was the first to buy a house…so really she’s probably doing things in the right order. Actually there is one other friend from that time who will never marry, or have children….she died in a car accident our junior year. Becky, a very good friend. I still miss her.
nonnie, me, theresa, becky
Nonnie, Me, Theresa, Becky

I got another call from my oldest, dearest, best friend. She is pregnant too, 2-3 weeks a head of me. We live really far apart so I only get phone calls and emails(which I would rather then nothing at all) I think it’s just the coolest thing that we got knocked up at the same time! It’s her first so I get to share all the gory wonders of pregnancy with her, the only thing that could make me more happy is if she lived next door. She just cracks me up…so stuborn…severly independent-big reason why I love her so much. Pregnancy has been really hard for her and I think if we were closer maybe it wouldn’t seem so bad. She says this is it – no more kids….hahaha….what she doesn’t know is all the suckyness fades and all she’ll remember is how wonderful it was to feel her daughter moving in her tummy and how amazing it was to hold her for the first time. Time will pass and she’ll do it again and wonder what was I thinking doing this again. Our memory’s evil plan…letting us only remember the amazing parts of pregnancy and none of the bad…well until your in the middle of it all over again. But boy the result of nine months of mostly suckyness is well worth it!!! She isn’t going to breast feed either, she just doesn’t want to…and to that I say good for you. Now before I go further with this you have to know that I breast feed Lennox well into his 12 month and plan on doing the same with Aidan. I am a strong believer in the benefits of breast feeding. But I also believe that if you are not comfortable(emotionally…I don’t think it’s ever physically comfortable-you just get used to it) nursing , then it’s not going to work. It’s going to cause more problems then if you just went with you original feelings…so when I say good for her I mean that she is not doing somthing to make everyone else happy. She is going to do what works for her! More women need to adopt this train of thought….do what works for you. You’ll be a happier mom and wife.

Bub courtney General mom mother


Today is a good day! The sun’s out – rain’s gone. I’ve spent the morning singing as Lennox played happily in his room. We have these little concerts daily, Lennox makes for a good audience clapping and dancing along with me. I wish I was coordinated enough to play an instrument and sing at the same time…I would totally take over all the local bars and coffee houses. More about this later….

Bub courtney Ev General mom mother

Buyers Beware

Today was a bad day. We got another bill in the mail for Lennox’s surgery… another very large bill. So I call and hope that maybe there was a mistake and there is actually only one bill. No luck there. Then I hope maybe it hasn’t been submitted to insurance yet…. yeah no luck again. So then starts the negotiations… I tell her(employee of hospital) what we can pay and she says how bout this much- 4 times more then my offer -and I say no this is what we can pay – same amount – I get put on hold – she comes back ands says Ok how bout this much? Almost 3 times more then my offer. Again I say NO WE CAN PAY THIS MUCH… and really we CAN’T pay that much but we are going to skip eating for the next 2 years so that we can pay you this amount you won’t except. She puts me on hold again – comes back and says ok, we’ll send you a financial aid application (which I already have for the other half of the bill that we can not pay off in 2 hours) and you can apply for prolonged monthly payments. WELL GEE maybe we could have come to this conclusion the moment I told you HOW MUCH I COULD PAY and you decided it wasn’t enough instead of trying to barter like I’m on the street in mexico. I mean it’s not like we are trying to get out of paying or pay less WE JUST NEED MORE TIME TO PAY.

Maybe if you had let us in on the cost of the surgery (like you said you were going to) before it actually took place, maybe we could have planned better and maybe able to pay what we deemed worthy of your services. It’s not like I bought my 18 month old son breast impants… HE HAD TO HAVE THIS SURGERY regardless of the cost. It’s just so frustrating!!!! I mean I understand their end services rendered and all but doesn’t that also usually involve knowing the cost up front or at least having an idea of the total cost. So you can then discuss it with your insurance provider and get an idea of what will be covered. Sure it does… you said yourself someone would sit down with me and figure that all out… but guess what? That never happened. I called and tried to get the information on my own… “Sure Mrs. Eckard it’s just going to take me a few days…” I get a call back 2 WEEKS AFTER his surgery has already been preformed and told the cost. How was I supposed to know that Lennox’s surgery would cost more then giving birth to him.

In the end, it’s all my fault for not being a pain in the butt and bugging them everyday until they gave me the info I needed… it’s all my fault for not being able to afford the good insurance… it’s my fault for growing a baby who would need surgery. So now I’m in tears and thinking this was supposed to be funny but it’s not, because I’m really mad at these people and at myself.

My husband leaned over and says you spell machette, m-a-c-h-e-t-t-e. So there’s the humor in it. I’m so angry I want to take Evan’s m-a-c-h-e-t-t-e over to the hospital and demand a more reasonable payment plan. But I can’t even spell machette.

Bub Ev General the kiddos

My Perfectly Wonderful Husband

Thank you for making an extremely tasty dinner and for washing-drying-putting away the dishes and for cleaning up the kitchen! It made my night and morning. Even after almost 4 years he still gets me all tweeterpatted!!! And speaking of wonderfully sweet things…Lennox gave another little girl his size a big hug at the park yesterday. He’s never done that before…and you could hear the awes from miles away. She didn’t like it so much and ran away. So he chased her down and tried again. It was both cute and tramatic depending on which child you were. He’s been hugging and kissing us for a while now and actually gave our friend Mel a big hug just a few days ago. He hugs the dogs and all his toys and sometimes even hugs the characters on his shirts….he’s got a lot of love to give.

Bub courtney General mom mooshoo mother pregnant the kiddos


Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about being a stay at home mom – the pros – the cons. How we are perceived by the world…our peers. Usually there are 2 views to this topic…the “how nice you get to stay home with your child” and the now defensive feeling insignificant stay at home mom who feels like she has to defend herself and goes into the how hard it is to be a stay at home mom at which point the other person/ people shut off and begin to think about how full of poo we are. So yeah it is nice to stay at home with my child because I know where he is…know he’s getting enough to eat and drink, enough kisses and hugs, enough diaper changes, enough fun inspirational educational activities. And yeah it’s nice not to have to get up and rush out the door in the morning only to sit in the sh*t ass California traffic. I don’t have to get out of my PJs or fix my hair, put on makeup..even shower for days at a time. And as cliche as it is I can and do watch a soap – All My Children – which I have watched since before I was born(it’s required in my family) Yes I go for walks to the park and sometimes(rarely) get to take a nap in the middle of the day. But on the other hand I provide all the safty and security for my son, my husband, 2 dogs , and turtle….I make all the meals, change all the diapers, provide the endless kisses and hugs, come up with and execute all the fun inspriational educational activities. And yeah I don’t have to get out of my PJs which is good because some days I can’t there is to much else to do….no time for a shower and even if I did get to have one it’s not alone. And let me tell you the pjs no shower thing isn’t great for the self esteem. And no I don’t have to get up and rush out and sit in traffic..but that doesn’t mean I get to sleep in and drink tea while reading the newspaper. I don’t get to sleep in ever. I am the first one up getting everyone else ready for their days. Yes I watch All My Childern but is usually while I’m doing 8 other things and the TV is turned up so loud the people down the street wonder if anyone will figure out it was Johnathan who drugged Greenly. Oh and those naps in the middle of the day…from time to time Lennox will fall asleep on me and I have no choice but to sit down and usually just end up falling asleep then being woken up by what ever part of my body I can no longer feel. I do all the shopping, pay all the bills, wash and put away all the laundry. I’m on 24 hours a day 7 days week… no vacations, no lunch/coffee breaks, no thank you-great job on the laundry today – no verbal validation. So for as many ways as my job is easy it is also hard…just like yours. Stay at homes are lucky to get to stay home with their kids…but not because it’s all bonbons and soaps but because it’s hard as much as it is easy and it’s life changing as much as it is fullfilling. It’s not only a job it’s a life!
Now having gone back and reading this it sounds defensive but I don’t mean it that way…I just mean it’s a whole different world with different rules. Stay at home moms just want the world to reconize how significant our job is. We have a partnership with our husbands and both sides are equally important. Money makes the world go round….but you still need someone to prepare the food you buy. Homemaking is a real profession that deserves respect.