what a train wreck we are. The wedding was beautiful-outside over looking the ocean. The San Francisco fog rolled in -but all it did was make everything that much more beautiful. Bub had a little break down when it was time to be quiet so we watched from a far. I didn’t realize he wanted to stand with his new friends and was making him stay with us which made him cry-hind sight. H looked amazing in her dress with flowers in her hair. You could definitely see how much they love eachother. The reception was at The Cliff House-really really nice resturant! Amazing ahi appetizers :) Bub was in heaven. First he had the attention of the older kids and danced with a pretty bridesmaid. Then the his size kids showed up and he went nuts-crazy mad chaos! Well in true Bub fashion he tripped and busted his lip open on a window sill, and boy did he bust it good. It was funny though he seemed more concerned with his clothes getting messed up then hurting himself. It’s didn’t help that it was also bed time. He would have had a break down at some point any way it was just a little earlier then I had hoped. The night quickly went down hill and we lefted before dinner was served-feeling sad and embarassed(well atleast me). I felt bad for Ev having to go and tried to make him stay-but he is too nice and went home with us. In hind sight we should of asked Bub’s Grandma C & Grandpa C to come up and hang out with him and only taken Aid with us. Speaking of Aid…he did excellent-just a happy camper the whole time.

You know I feel like I learn new things on a daily basis…today I learned don’t wear heals any where that you will be standing a lot while holding 20lb give or take children. No matter how cute the shoes are or how great they make you feel…that feeling will be gone in about 10 minutes. And this next thing is an important one…If your 2 year old can not sit still during story time in the library-taking him to a wedding is probably a bad idea-again hind sight. Being a mom brings about so many new things a lot of which are emotions. You tend to take on every thing as your fault. Bub having break downs and us having to leave the wedding early-MY FAULT. I know deep down it’s not really my fault and I have very little control over how life happens. But there’s a big part of me that says if you were a better mom then he would be more well behaved. When really both times he broke down had nothing to do with bad behavior at all. Life is just crazy and I like having this outlet to write because even if I don’t always write everything I think about writing I still go through things in my head and end up working out feelings that started as one thing and then I realize that they really are another. Like feeling embarrassed that Bub started crying during the wedding…no need to be embarrassed because no one will remember oh that kid crying at the start of the ceremony. Nor does anyone think I’m a bad mom because my kid fell busted his lip and was not in such a hot mood afterward. We didn’t ruin the wedding. It gives a reason to work things out in my head. Ok enough babble I need to go to bed.